Is There Sex After 60? – Part 2

Keep Your Sex Life Important, Give it a Check up!

Just because we start getting gray hair, wrinkles where smooth skin once use to be and aches in joints we didn’t know we had, doesn’t mean we should let our sex life go into retirement.

There are some key things you can do to help keep your sex life important as your get older.

Communication is a key to all our daily lives. We communicate with co-workers, family and friends on a daily basis. It is no different with your intimacy partner. Even though it may feel uncomfortable, talk to your partner openly and honestly about your sexual relationship. Talk openly and honestly about any problems rather than ignoring them. If you ignore them, they will not go away but rather sit and fester, then boil to the surface. Problems are harder to handle when tempers are hot.

Communicate feelings of inadequacy or self esteem issues. If you are having issues about your body image, this may affect your ability to enjoy intimacy. Talk about this with your partner or professional health care provider if necessary. Feelings such as being too old and less attractive are common as we age.

Creativity is another key to keeping your sex life important as you age. Focus on your strengths and be creative in finding ways to make yourself feel more attractive. This will help with those self esteem issues.


Be creative in finding ways to spend time with your partner. Create time for long walks (if you are able to do the physical exercise), time for romantic dinners, bubble baths or just time to snuggle and watch a movie together. It is important to find time for you and your partner to be alone and spend time together. And if acceptable explore new ways to give sexual pleasure to each other and to yourself.

Remember to be patient. Both men and women may notice that it tends to take longer to become sexually aroused than when you were younger. More touching and manual stimulation may be needed to become fully aroused. This is normal with age and is not related to a lack of interest in your partner.

If you notice that you are generally less interested in sex, there may be other factors involved. Things such as stress, depression, tiredness and some medications can affect your sex drive. Medication taken for high blood pressure and some anti-depressants are known to have some adverse side effects on libido. If you take medications and suspect they may be the cause of your problems, talk with your physician. There may be alternative medications for the ones you are taking. Never stop taking a prescribed medication without speaking to your doctor.


Some women as they age may find they have vaginal dryness. This is not an arousal issue, just an age related issue usually. Your doctor can prescribe medications for you or you can speak to the pharmacist and use a recommended over the counter vaginal lubricant. Occasionally this problem can be related to lack of hormones. Talk to your Doctor also about hormone replacement therapy (HRT), or use of natural plant estrogen if you have had a hysterectomy or are reaching menopause.

Also as women, we can maintain our muscle tone in the vaginal wall. Strong muscle tone can not only increase sensations during intercourse for you and your partner, but it can also help with preventing urinary incontinence. This seems to be a major problem with women as we age. A Simple sneeze, cough or laugh can cause urinary leakage. Talk to your physician about Kegal exercises and the proper way to perform them.

Erectile Dysfunction (ED) seems to be one of the main problems men encounter as they age. Some times this can be simply from the normal aging process, but other times there is an under lying health issue that is the cause. Some medications and some diseases such as diabetes, and prostate cancer have been linked with ED. Discuss this matter openly and honestly with your physician.

For many men, impotence can be successfully treated or controlled. Once your doctor and you have discussed the issues and checked into the cause of your ED, treatment may include the use of medications, penile implants, or other devices to help get and maintain an erection.

The presence of a medical condition does not have to put an end to your sex life. Talk with your doctor to overcome any obstacles these conditions might present. Adaptation may have to be made. You may have to try new sexual positions if your favorite position puts to much strain on your condition. You need to learn ways to conserve your energy if you fatigue easily. These are things that you need to talk openly and honestly about with your sex partner and perhaps even with your doctor. And as always, practice safe sex especially if you do not know your partner’s health status or sexual history.